The tease, a small reminder of their history, served contrarily to point out how far they'd come, and set Regina somewhat more at ease. Enough so that she reached for the vinegar to pour into a dish and dunked a chip before she tried to say anything more than, "Just don't order the ale. Pixie piss would taste better," with a quixotic little smile at the memory of saying the same to Neil.
Regina considered the situation and likely drift of conversation and said, "Irish coffee. I may intend to drink enough to need the pick me up." Besides, she'd already had a sandwich for lunch.
"It's that bad, huh?" Emma replied, her tone light but her expression much more concerned. She levered herself up and tapped the table with her knuckles. "Sit tight. I'll be right back."
She ambled over to the bar, and a few minutes later, returned with two deliciously boozy coffees in tall mugs (both topped with whipped cream and sprinkled with cinnamon, naturally). "So what's up?" she asked, setting a cup down in front of Regina and keeping one for herself.
Unlike the rest of the Charmings, Regina didn't like cinnamon on her hot chocolate or her coffee. But it was sweet that Emma thought of her as family enough that it didn't occur to her she might not. For today, that was reason enough to enjoy the extra spice the coffee didn't really need.
She managed (a queen, naturally, and therefore more refined) a healthy sip of the coffee -- more like booze with coffee, bless Swan -- without getting a noseful of whipped cream, or coffee up a lung from the bright burn of Irish whiskey, and then cradled the mug in her hands. The heat didn't do much to soothe the panic she'd been swallowing down most of the day, but it gave her something to do while she mouthed the words, "I'm afraid of what I'll do if anything takes him away."
Less concerned with being refined, Emma scooped up a dollop of whipped cream with her finger and licked it off before taking a careful sip of her coffee.
"You're afraid you'll...what, go evil?" Emma asked, reachingd for a fry (chip--whatever you call them in pub speak). She didn't think she needed Regina to elaborate on the him.
Regina dropped Emma's gaze again immediately and shook her head. "Not exactly. Not...immediately." She took another generous sip of the coffee, less carefully, and ended up with whipped cream all over her mouth. That was fine. Licking it off her lips gave her another moment to re-center herself, swallow down the wave of hurt that rose at the memories of old loss and fear of new.
"It took everything I had to let go of Robin. It was the right thing to do, but I... I can't do it again."
Emma felt a sharp stab of guilt, but she was working hard on letting that go; she knew she'd caused Regina pain, and she hated that, but she wasn't sure she'd do anything different if given the chance. Marian hadn't deserved to die.
"What makes you think you'll have to?" she asked, setting her cup down for a moment and wrapping her fingers around it to warm up her hands.
Despite Emma's role in her most recent loss, Regina's voice truly held no malice. If anything, she sounded tired and her knuckles had gone white from holding so tight to her coffee.
"Villains don't get happy endings," she said, the way she had so many times before. "Not even reformed villains."
But that wasn't the thing on her mind today, not exactly. She pulled out her phone and pulled up the message that had provoked her originally, then turned the phone to face Emma. "Also, this. They're not wrong. I saw a pregnant friend ripped from her husband in New Dodge. People disappear every day."
Emma took the phone and scanned over the message, a little frown creasing her forehead. Regina had a lot more experience with all of this...world hopping than Emma did, but still. She shook her head firmly and slid the device back across the table.
"I don't believe that," she insisted. "Anyone who's willing to try for it can get a happy ending. Otherwise what the hell are we even doing? If someone disappears, we'll find them. If this is your happy ending, then we don't stop fighting for it, whatever happens."
The vehemence of Emma's response (if not exactly the content; she was a Charming) caught Regina by surprise, and left her swallowing around a lump in her throat. She wished briefly that they were the sort of friends where she might reach for Emma's hand or awkwardly fling herself into an embrace--not in gratitude, but for the comfort of it. And then she wanted to vomit up the saccharine sentiment and slap herself for good measure.
The sickening confusion of her emotions probably showed on her face and she did nothing to hide it. "That, the last bit, is exactly what worries me."
Emma did reach across the table and lay her hand on Regina's wrist, giving a light squeeze with her fingers. "Fighting for your happiness doesn't have to be mean...doing anything dark, Regina," she insisted, shaking her head, her own face reflecting only empathy and concern.
When Emma reached over to touch her, Regina didn't flinch away. In fact, she lay her own hand over Emma's and squeezed back. As long as she didn't have to think about it too much, she was actually not terrible at returning friendly gestures.
"Love makes people, makes me, do terrible things," she demurred, but part of her rose up to agree with Emma. "But I think...I'm more afraid of doing something dark than I am likely to do it. I don't want to go back to who I was. I just don't know how stable I'll be if something happens to Neil or the kids."
"Guess I'll just have to have more faith in you than you have in yourself," Emma replied with a wry smile. "You won't do it, Regina. You've worked too hard to become who you are. And if you forget, I'll be here to remind you."
Grateful enough to let it show, Regina actually smiled. "With a firm boot to ass, I assume," she replied, but it was almost playful and doubled as a thank you, if you spoke Regina.
Not one to let a moment like that linger, she said, "Which reminds me. We should be working on your magic lessons." Emma hadn't been through the disaster of her magic getting the better of her yet, which meant she also didn't have control of it. "If you don't learn to control it, it will control you."
Emma's fluency in Regina speak was getting better every day. She just smirked. "If that's what it took."
She hummed softly and nodded her agreement, pausing to take a sip from her cup full of boozy coffee. "You're right. It's been...kind of a roller coaster with that. I honestly thought I'd lost it forever, when we were back in the Enchanted Forest."
Regina accepted both smirk and nod without comment, letting the alcohol in her coffee do its work in soothing the angst that had occasioned the call in the first place. The observation, though, that raised her eyebrow.
"I don't know," Emma admitted, turning her coffee cup. "Hook thought I was...not lying, exactly, but maybe lying to myself. That not having magic made it easier to go back to New York and pretend I wasn't the Savior. Maybe he was right, or maybe I just had to accept who I am to truly break Zelena's curse. It wasn't until we were trapped in Rumpelstiltskin's creepy forbidden magic room that it all came back."
Impressed with Hook's insight, Regina bit back her usual snark where he was concerned. He did know Emma better than anyone but her mother, and in this case, "He's not wrong," she allowed. "Closer to right than not, anyhow."
She caught a glance at the server for their section and made the universal gesture for another round. And in the meantime, she channeled magic through her fingertips, not a spell, just a magical "effect", more or less, and warmed both of their drinks. "Nothing worse than lukewarm coffee," came her murmured explanation.
"Inborn magic is directly tied to emotion, which is why it tends to show up first when you're threatened or pissed off." Emma knew this, but it wouldn't hurt to remind her, if she was ready to listen this time. "Your magic breaks your blocks when you can't afford to let your doubts and your emotions get in your way, but the rest of the time..." A shrug. Sometimes she could access it, sometimes she couldn't, and when she could, her control was miserable.
"Yeah, I know," Emma replied with a light sigh. "I need a lot of work." Even now, after Emma had accepted her home and her fate as the Savior--the magic was just one more thing, one more heavy responsibility that she'd never asked for. Save the town. Save all the happy endings. Learn to use magic you never wanted. And so on, and so on, and so on.
Still, she indulged in only a moment or two of sulky self-pity with her refreshed coffee before she shrugged it off. "When can we start?"
Regina gave her the moment and would have given her more if she needed it. It had taken time and distance to realize it, but Emma's difficulty with accepting her magic wasn't something Regina could force her through. She needed to be patient and try to see it from Emma's place instead of through the lens of her jealousy of Emma's natural ability.
When she asked, Regina didn't let her excitement surface and overwhelm Emma, just said, "You tell me."
Emma smiled a little and moved a shoulder. "My schedule's pretty open." She certainly didn't have as much to keep her busy as Regina did. "So...as soon as possible. Whatever's convenient for you."
Re: text -> action
Re: text -> action
Re: text -> action
Re: text -> action
She ambled over to the bar, and a few minutes later, returned with two deliciously boozy coffees in tall mugs (both topped with whipped cream and sprinkled with cinnamon, naturally). "So what's up?" she asked, setting a cup down in front of Regina and keeping one for herself.
Re: text -> action
She managed (a queen, naturally, and therefore more refined) a healthy sip of the coffee -- more like booze with coffee, bless Swan -- without getting a noseful of whipped cream, or coffee up a lung from the bright burn of Irish whiskey, and then cradled the mug in her hands. The heat didn't do much to soothe the panic she'd been swallowing down most of the day, but it gave her something to do while she mouthed the words, "I'm afraid of what I'll do if anything takes him away."
no subject
"You're afraid you'll...what, go evil?" Emma asked, reachingd for a fry (chip--whatever you call them in pub speak). She didn't think she needed Regina to elaborate on the him.
no subject
"It took everything I had to let go of Robin. It was the right thing to do, but I... I can't do it again."
no subject
"What makes you think you'll have to?" she asked, setting her cup down for a moment and wrapping her fingers around it to warm up her hands.
no subject
Despite Emma's role in her most recent loss, Regina's voice truly held no malice. If anything, she sounded tired and her knuckles had gone white from holding so tight to her coffee.
"Villains don't get happy endings," she said, the way she had so many times before. "Not even reformed villains."
But that wasn't the thing on her mind today, not exactly. She pulled out her phone and pulled up the message that had provoked her originally, then turned the phone to face Emma. "Also, this. They're not wrong. I saw a pregnant friend ripped from her husband in New Dodge. People disappear every day."
no subject
"I don't believe that," she insisted. "Anyone who's willing to try for it can get a happy ending. Otherwise what the hell are we even doing? If someone disappears, we'll find them. If this is your happy ending, then we don't stop fighting for it, whatever happens."
no subject
The sickening confusion of her emotions probably showed on her face and she did nothing to hide it. "That, the last bit, is exactly what worries me."
no subject
no subject
"Love makes people, makes me, do terrible things," she demurred, but part of her rose up to agree with Emma. "But I think...I'm more afraid of doing something dark than I am likely to do it. I don't want to go back to who I was. I just don't know how stable I'll be if something happens to Neil or the kids."
no subject
no subject
Not one to let a moment like that linger, she said, "Which reminds me. We should be working on your magic lessons." Emma hadn't been through the disaster of her magic getting the better of her yet, which meant she also didn't have control of it. "If you don't learn to control it, it will control you."
no subject
She hummed softly and nodded her agreement, pausing to take a sip from her cup full of boozy coffee. "You're right. It's been...kind of a roller coaster with that. I honestly thought I'd lost it forever, when we were back in the Enchanted Forest."
no subject
"What happened?"
no subject
no subject
She caught a glance at the server for their section and made the universal gesture for another round. And in the meantime, she channeled magic through her fingertips, not a spell, just a magical "effect", more or less, and warmed both of their drinks. "Nothing worse than lukewarm coffee," came her murmured explanation.
"Inborn magic is directly tied to emotion, which is why it tends to show up first when you're threatened or pissed off." Emma knew this, but it wouldn't hurt to remind her, if she was ready to listen this time. "Your magic breaks your blocks when you can't afford to let your doubts and your emotions get in your way, but the rest of the time..." A shrug. Sometimes she could access it, sometimes she couldn't, and when she could, her control was miserable.
no subject
Still, she indulged in only a moment or two of sulky self-pity with her refreshed coffee before she shrugged it off. "When can we start?"
no subject
When she asked, Regina didn't let her excitement surface and overwhelm Emma, just said, "You tell me."
no subject
wrap?